Even Better
“I expect this is fifty to seventy percent of what you need and we’ll make it better together.”
When I am at my best, this is my approach to inviting feedback on something I am working on for a client.
What happens next has happened to me 100 times if it’s happened to me once. Generally, here’s how it goes:
They have “the nerve” to share ideas on how I could do it even better!
A feeling bubbles up in my reptilian brain. I start to feel defensive over the very thing I just said was fifty to seventy percent of what they need.
My work is being attacked!
I am being attacked.
I haven't explained it fully. Wait, why can’t they see this is really good? Why can’t they see all the good things I see?
It's as if I forget I asked for feedback. I get caught up in something that’s really only a draft.
I know logically it’s not perfect. Nothing ever is on the first attempt. (or ever, really)
Yet… somewhere deep in my brain, I am hoping it’s 100%, exactly what they want and need.
That’s when my eye catches the post-it note affixed to the wall by my desk. It’s a mantra “Even Better” I use to remind myself I can make this even better.
My mindset shifts. I settle my brain. The defensive feeling melts away. I’m curious and open to feedback again. I want to hear how I could make this even better.
What is the Even Better Mindset?
A person with a growth mindset would say, “We can do this even better.”
Having a growth mindset means: “Individuals who believe their talents can be developed (through hard work, good strategies, and input from others)…” (What Having a “Growth Mindset” Actually Means, Carol Dweck) Those with a fixed mindset, on the other hand, “believe their talents are innate gifts.”
It’s a mindset that allows a person to be open to change. To be open to improvement. To be open to others’ perspectives. To look for opportunities to help others become even better.
Leaders holding an Even Better mindset drive openness to feedback, continuous improvement of processes, individual and team growth, and ultimately business growth. It is a mindset where they look to add more value and introduce new and better options.
Why the Even Better Mindset Makes a Difference
Back to my story, the first time I review a draft and solicit feedback, there's a little bit of pain involved. There’s just no way around it. I often catch myself beating myself up thinking, “Eric, you didn’t get it right.” I try to remind myself:
Even Better enables greater impact.
Even Better is serving my client’s needs better.
Even Better results in people actually using this.
When I am delivering a final product that really meets the needs of those I serve, when the product goes from 92% fit to 100% fit, it feels more than just 8% better.
That reminder makes me more willing to accept and build off others’ ideas because I know it actually leads to an Even Better outcome.
For those who produce something for others (which is all of us, I think!), if you hold that mindset, you’ll better serve others.
Alternatively, if you stay in isolation, don’t seek out the feedback, or dismiss it when it shows up, what you produce almost certainly will not be your best work.
So, how can we have an Even Better mindset?
Here are some ideas that have worked for me:
Create your own mantra (or use mine – it is simply “Even Better”!) and come back to it often: make it visible in your work area. I say mine every morning when I sit down at my desk.
Remind yourself that progress is the goal.
Learn more about the growth mindset and how to use that mindset to “learn from criticism”
When you start to feel defensive, work to stay open and curious. Ask open-ended questions. I have found the simple act of saying out loud to the feedback provider “Tell me more about what you are thinking” helps tamp down the defensive response.
Find a partner to keep you accountable to the mindset. Ask them to remind you to stay open and curious before you seek out feedback on something.
Set the stage during a meeting when reviewing a draft. Ask for suggestions to make your work even better, such as: “I would love it if we could find 10 ways to make this even better.”
Mentally prepare yourself before you know you are reviewing something you produced.
When you review the draft, bring humor or other ways to lighten the mood. That could help you take the feedback better.
What could you make Even Better right now?
We have an opportunity to make things Even Better as we continue to navigate how we do business in new and different ways during a pandemic.
“Crises can help eliminate the ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it’ belief that pervades many organizations, creating new opportunities for people to voice their ideas on how to do things better.” (5 Ways a Crisis can Help you Cultivate a Growth Mindset, Ashford, Sytch and Greer)
What have you done in a new or different way since Covid-19 started?
What opportunities do you see to do something Even Better?